Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Wednesday July 8th

I woke up to what was going to be the gassiest day of my life. I ate breakfast and hopped out of bed. Kalli put the toot machine in my backpack which hangs right at my butt on the back of the wheelchair creating the perfect set up to make people think the noises were really coming from my rear end. So I headed out to my first therapy with my remote control between my knees, easily accessible to trick anyone.

My first therapy was PT group. Sally had several different activities set up all over the main center area by the reception desk. One of the activities included bending over to pick up horse shoes and plastic rings. Every single time I would bend over created the perfect situation to let one rip. This poor volunteer girl that was working with me and trying her hardest not to laugh at this poor boy in a wheelchair with incredible gas he could not control each time he bent over. This went on and on every moment I could I would pull the trigger and get an incredible reaction from someone or another. In the hospital is by far the best place in the world to have such a device because everyone thinks "oh he can't control it" or "don't worry, that is fine, that is natural" and the therapists don't let it get to them as if it is out of the ordinary at all. We worked on wheelies, hopping over obstacles, keeping your momentum, and also time to ourselves to find out how much distance we were comfortably covering with our normal wheelchair pace. After making probably twenty some people on the floor think that I had the most amazing gas I headed to the canary room for my next session.

We had set up a meeting with Rose, my case manager, in order to discuss all the questions from yesterday. So Kalli, my mom, and Mr and Mrs Lee and I sat down and went over everything from top to bottom as to where we need to be, what we need to do, and how we do it in order to successfully provide for my future.

After that, I headed to the gym to work with a neat piece of equipment I had requested Carey to reserve for me. RIC has a electronic sensor mat the size of your wheelchair seat pad that you place on your wheelchair and then sit down on. This mat shows where your weight is distributed on the chair. The mat hooks up to the laptop and shows your pressure points in a color sensored map of the seat. This allows you to perform different pressure relief breaks and see which ones work the best to get your weight off your tailbone. I really wanted to work with this piece of equipment because there is no way for me to really tell how well I am relieving the pressure when I do the pressure reliefs on my own. For in the beginning, Kalli and my mom would almost always tip me back to do them for me. Now that I am stronger I am totally able to do them myself in a couple different ways.

After the mat we ate lunch in the canary room. Next, was OT exercise group. Once again, this incredible gassy-ness overcame my body. Almost every time I moved I was having terrible flatulence. The guy sitting next to me was about ready to move and several people kept laughing as I continued to play it off as if I couldn't stop and definitely couldn't control it. My roommate now because of last night was the only one aware of the machine and was sitting next to me while we were exercising. He could not stop laughing, especially knowing that it was fake and that no one else knew. It made for quite a bit of fun.

After exercise group Maurice and I had a double PT scheduled with Corey a physical therapist I had never had. Corey put us both on a mat together and we worked on different stretching which felt good for due to the bladder infection I was experiencing increased spasms in my legs, so stretching them out felt really good.

After therapy,I stayed in the gym and did several sets of exercises on a couple different weight machines. Everyday I will continue to build up my arm strength which makes everything so much easier as I begin to feel lighter and lighter.

After a good workout we went and hung out in our room for a bit and then all went to get some dinner and eat it in the canary room. Of course, a couple good toots were released there as well and still people just laughed and understood because I am just a guy in a wheelchair that can't control it.

After dinner Kalli and I headed into my room to do a little blogging and start my nightly routine, which I am sure will include some gassy bowels and a lot of laughter. I don't think I could have pulled off an entire day of fake farting anywhere else and it definitely helps that I am in a wheelchair. For some reason or another people are just a little more understanding and it is absolutely hilarious. I wouldn't doubt if I got a funny look from over 40 people today from a good toot! Throughout all that laughter and funny looks not a single person, except my roommate, the nurse and PCT from last night know that it is all just an electronic machine.


  1. Did you let one rip when you were with my parents? LOL

  2. That is Great Andrew! It sure is good to laugh! I bet you had such a fun time with that.

    Jenny Laird-(shorty)

  3. Glad you sound so much better today!
    I'm sure it's a bummer to have bladder
    Anyway, the prayer group has you in their
    hearts and think of you every day!
    Be strong.
    "Seek and ye shall find...."

  4. u are hilarious.
    never too old for a good toot joke...or one that lasts several hours or days.
    now maybe you need to start carrying around some hard boiled eggs and crack em open periodically and get a good smell going, too!

  5. Hey, Hippert and Kalli! I have been meaning to catch up on my reading and post again for awhile, but moving has kept me pretty busy!

    Sounds like you had a good time with that machine. I really wish I could've witnessed the people's faces!

    Glad to hear you are still doing well and had a better day. You are an inspiration. Keep it up!


  6. What? My parents didn't bring you a fart machine? They talked about finances instead? How boring and predictable =)

    Betsy Much